if I don’t get this cake when I turn 23 then there will be no turning 23
pros of dating me
- you can hold my hand whenever you want
- you can cuddle with me whenever you want
- you can kiss me whenever you want
cons of dating me
- i get jealous easily
- i’m sad a lot
- i will never feel good enough for you no matter how many times you tell me i am
People hate that I flip two cigarettes
Upside down in each pack
But I hate that people notice
When you gain three pounds,
But not when you buy a new hat.
I’ve been told that the way I sleep
With one leg draped over
The person lying next to me
But I think it’s annoying
When people tell me
I look pretty,
But only when I paint my face.
I’ve heard that old men
Like to touch the girls who work late at bars,
But I want to know
Why they never kiss the women they married
fourty-two years ago.
I’ve noticed that mothers teach their daughters
That it’s rude to refuse a hug
From an uncle they’ve met three times,
But forget to teach them
That they aren’t obliged to kiss
The boy who paid for dinner.